I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
