seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
