you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
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