Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Randomize
