he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
