I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize