he thought i was a dude.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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