She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
so let's talk penis.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Randomize
