Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
