I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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