can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
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