The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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