I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Randomize
