Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
