She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize