Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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