awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
