Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize