census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize