my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize