What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Randomize
