we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
