You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize
