I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize