KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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