And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I didn't shave. On purpose
I can text with my tongue
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
