i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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