this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize