Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
