Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
They should really pass out barf bags in church
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Randomize