nut hugger
i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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