After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
