i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
