i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
We have started to decorate penises.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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