Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize