so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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