they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
