For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
