I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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