We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
