this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
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