Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
