If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Randomize
