some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
