bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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