so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
