I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize