Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
