i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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