how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
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