So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
